1. Say “Thank You” when you’re receiving a compliment.
We often ruin compliments by devaluing the statement or acting overly humble. Internally, you might think this prevents you from appearing arrogant or smug.
The problem is that by deflecting the praise of a genuine compliment, you don’t acknowledge the person who was nice enough to say something. Simply saying “Thank You” fully acknowledges the person who made the compliment and allows you to enjoy the moment as well.
Example: “Your dress looks great.”
Instead of: “Oh, this old thing? I’ve had it for years.”
Try saying: “Thank you. I’m glad you like it.”
Example: “Wow! 20 points tonight. You played really well in the game.”
Instead of: “Yeah, but I missed that wide-open shot in the 3rd quarter.”
Try saying: “Thank you. It was a good night.”
Example: “You killed your presentation today!”
Instead of: “Did I? I felt so nervous up there. I’m glad it looked alright.”
Try saying: “Thank you. I’m happy it went well.”
There is something empowering about fully accepting a compliment. When you deflect praise, you can’t really own it. When you just say “Thank You,” you let the weight of the compliment sink in and become yours. Saying “Thank You” gives your mind permission to be built up by the compliments you receive.
Getting compliments should be fun and enjoyable, but we often ruin the experience. There’s no need to sabotage compliments that come your way. Accept them with grace and enjoy the moment.
2. Say “Thank You” when you’re running late.
Being late is the worst. It’s stressful for the person who is running late and it’s disrespectful to the person who is waiting.
It might seem strange to thank someone for dealing with your hassle, but that’s exactly the correct response. Most people stumble in the door and say, “Sorry I’m late.”
The problem is this response still makes the situation about you. Sorry, I’m late. Saying “Thank You” turns the tables and acknowledges the sacrifice the other person made by waiting. Thank you for waiting.
Example: You walk in the door 14 minutes late.
Instead of: “So sorry I’m late. Traffic was insane out there.”
Try saying: “Thank you for your patience.”
When we make a mistake, someone else often makes a sacrifice. Our default response is to apologize for our failure, but the better approach is to praise their patience and loyalty. Thank them for what they did despite your error.
3. Say “Thank You” when you’re comforting someone.
When someone comes to you with bad news, it can be awkward. You want to be a good friend, but most people don’t know what to say. I know I’ve felt that way before.
Often times, we think it’s a good idea to add a silver lining to the problem. “Well, at least you have…”
What we fail to realize is that it doesn’t matter if you don’t know what to say. All you really need is to be present and thank them for trusting you.
Example: Your co-worker’s mother passed away recently.
Instead of: “At least you have a lot of fond memories to hold onto.”
Try saying: “Thank you for sharing that with me. I know this is a hard time for you.”
Example: Your brother lost his job.
Instead of: “At least you have your health.”
Try saying: “Thank you for sharing this with me. I’m here to support you.”
Example: Your friend’s pet just died.
Instead of: “At least they had a long and happy life.”
Try saying: “Thank you for sharing that with me. I’m here for you.”
In times of suffering, we don’t need to hear words to ease the pain as much as we need someone to share our pain. When you don’t know what to say, just say “Thank You” and be there.
4. Say “Thank You” when you’re receiving helpful feedback.
Feedback can be very helpful, but we rarely see it that way. Whether it is an unflattering performance review from your boss or an email from an unhappy customer, the standard reaction is to get defensive. That’s a shame because the correct response is to simply say, “Thank You” and use the information to improve.
Example: “This work isn
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